Chapter 9 : Shizuku’s Perspective ①


My name is Suzumiya Shizuku, your average shut-in gamer that can be found anywhere.
The game I was particularly into recently was, «Fantasy Frontier Online», or FFO for short.
Since I’d been playing early on when service had just started, my character, “Tia,” became famous as a top player, but…… Right now, because of a certain reason, I was playing on a sub-account that I’d created.

If I had to say why,

“Okay! Cocoa-chan, is this fine?”

It’s because my sister began playing this game.

“Yep, perfect.”

While I was snapping screenshots of my sister who had somehow transformed into a beautiful little girl, and furthermore was wearing a frilly magical girl costume, I remembered back to today’s exchange.

Onee-chan had suddenly bought the insanely expensive VR gear and spent a sleepless night on the settings immediately after. When it became morning, she asked if we could play together.

You should sleep first before worrying about the game.

My inner retort was in vain and my persistent sister was completely motivated. Still, I turned her down her request once.

It wasn’t like I didn’t believe that she’d definitely lacked sleep, but I was concerned about something else beyond that.
…… I didn’t want her to see how I was online.
Well, yeah. My emotions online greatly differed from how I acted normally and I didn’t want onee-chan to see that sort of thing…… Does it make sense? This feeling.
Rather, who am I even explaining this to……

“At any rate, is it really okay for this to be the payment for the equipment?”

“Yeah, it’s all good.”

As I said that to onee-chan who was tilting her head…… Or rather, Bell in this case, I fished out something else from my item box

Generally speaking, I refused her once, but it wasn’t as if I didn’t really want to play with onee-chan. It’s just that I didn’t want to destroy the “Tia” character that I’ve established, nor did I want her to know about it yet.
That said, with such an absurd condition, I couldn’t really say that I wanted to play together right now either.
At that time, I’d heard that onee-chan soon ran into trouble with her equipment, so I made a sub character by the name of Cocoa under the pretense of it being “my friend,” and decided to casually support her.

“Bell’s cute, so these screenshots were already well worth 40,000 credits alone.”

Since onee-chan didn’t have enough funds for the equipment I was going to make for her, I told her I’d make it free of charge on the condition that she would wear the equipment that I’d prepared before hand and be the subject of my photography.
It was only 40,000 credits. If you progressed through the game a little, you’ll earn that amount right away, so a discount like this was at least acceptable right?
Rather, if I posted these screenshots on my blog, the site visits would increase and I’d be able to gain some real money through it too. Well, I won’t hand them over though. This was for my own collection after all.

“Is that so? Ahaha, if you say it like that, then all the effort I gave in creating it was worth it!”

Whether she knew about my feelings or not, onee-chan accepted the praise on her appearance and looked happy inside as she stroked her own head.

I’ll say this honestly but, she was incredibly cute. What the heck is this? It was to the point where I even wanted to hug her right this instant?
I mean, yeah. I knew it was actually onee-chan inside and she made this character to entice me. I’d already found out that she spent an entire night creating it for ridiculous reasons such as so.
But, did you really need to go that far to create something like this? Are you stupid, seriously.

Well, I guess, it made me happy that she went that far for my sake though……

“Then, next was this, alright?”

“It’s fine, but…… I heard you were a beginner, but unexpectedly, Cocoa-chan sure owns a lot of equipment, huh.”

Upon seeing the maid outfit that I’d taken out subsequently, onee-chan seemed to have had a question in mind.
But it’s okay, I’ve properly prepared an excuse for this.

“Its performance was better than the beginner’s equipment, but its considered a joke equipment that’s difficult to use seriously and it was just collecting dust in her item box, so Tia let me have it.”

“I see, its performance was certainly better, but…… True, something made seriously would probably be better than this.”

Onee-chan who practically didn’t know how to doubt people, easily accepted my explanation.
Really, she was different from me in a sense that she could manage anything since she was a good person at heart.

If I wasn’t around, she’d surely be living a lot more comfortably.

“Hey Cocoa-chan. Cocoa-chan is friends with Tia right? How was she doing in game? Was she having fun?”

Even now, she should just forget about me and enjoy the game she’s playing. Yet, she immediately starts talking about me again.
I was happy about that…… But it’s also painful.

After all, I felt like my existence was a large burden on onee-chan.

“It’s okay, she’s always having fun. She also has a lot of friends and everyone usually relies on her.”

Onee-chan might not be able to imagine something like that since she only knew of the usual me who was a shut-in, but it was true. The game was fun, and regarding friends…… I somewhat had them too.
The fact that I was being relied on wasn’t exactly a lie either. As for why, the live videos and the guides I post on my blog were getting quite an amount of views that I could boast about. It also serves as a source of income too.
I casually lied to onee-chan about earning the VR gear in a prize competition, but to tell you the truth, I actually bought it with my own money. If she knew about this, onee-chan would probably be surprised. Fufufu.

Though, the only 2 people who knew about this currently was, Ranka-san and Mimori-san. I still kept it a secret from onee-chan.
Someday, I’ll become a gamer who’s a lot more popular and earn enough to live off of my own salary…… When that happens, I’ll reveal everything.

I can definitely do it.
I’ll be able to live by myself even without onee-chan’s support.
So…… Onee-chan should live for her own sake as well.

If that happens, I’ll surely be able to face onee-chan honestly like I did when I was younger.
This entire time…… After mom and dad died, I’ve closed myself off in my own little shell and did nothing but game. Despite that, onee-chan kept on protecting me with all her effort. One day, I’ll finally be able to properly say thank you.

That’s why……

“I see…… So that girl was doing her best even without me knowing. Fufuu. That’s amazing.”

Again, please don’t praise me.
Unlike onee-chan, I’m a good-for-nothing failure of a human, so please don’t look at me in that way onee-chan…… I’m happy. I’m really happy about it, but any more than this and I won’t be able to take a step forward anymore.
The goal I’m heading towards was still very far ahead of me. I can’t afford to stop at a place like this.

Even so…… The fact that I’m happy about it doesn’t change.
I desperately resist the urge to break into a smile, but I couldn’t control myself.
In order to hide it, I had no choice besides turning away.

“Hm? What’s wrong, Cocoa-chan?”

My older sister who had just changed into a maid outfit comes peering at my expression closely.
Since I’d wanted to become someone like onee-chan, at one point in time, I somehow veered off the path and got really engrossed in games where the main heroine was a younger sister. Because of that, I truly became fond of little sisters and so, her adorable face was a direct hit to my preferences.

If onee-chan was really my little sister, I wonder if I’d be able to be as honest as onee-chan was.
In a sense, that delusion had become real and was in front of me right now.

“Hey, Bell. Actually, is it alright if I had one more request?”

“A request? That’s fine, but what is it?”

“Just for a while, I want to hug you.”

Though I held back on the skin-ship a short time ago since it’d be embarrassing, before I realized it, I was one asking for it myself.
Was that okay? Bell tilted her head before replying, “It’s okay,” and when she answered, I tightly held her in my arms.
The warmth of her body was conveyed along with her small breaths.
This dainty figure as well as this softness were all nothing but illusions created by the program.
We both hid behind our avatars and I was feigning my true identity. Even though it should’ve been a hug that was wrapped in lies……

…… It’s nostalgic.

The memories of onee-chan hugging me when I was younger had resurfaced.
However, I was the one doing the hugging this time. Onee-chan who appeared so big before, was now this small.

“Nn~, ehehe. I think this is the first time I’ve experienced something as new as this. The warmth feels nice……”

Onee-chan said something unexpected from within my arms.
For onee-chan it might’ve been just a few casual words, but for me, they were words that made me consider various things.

…… Onee-chan was there for me. No matter how selfish my words were, no matter how cold I was to her, onee-chan would still look after me to the point where it was troublesome.
However, onee-chan didn’t have anyone like that. There was no one for her to lean on or act spoiled and vulnerable towards.

“…… Then, I’ll do this again from time to time.”

“Cocoa-chan?”

If so, then I wanted to at least be able to fill that role in the game.
In real life, I was still a weak, bothersome little sister who couldn’t be honest.
But here, disguised as “Cocoa,” and in front of “Bell,” I feel like I’ll be able to become a bit more like onee-chan.

“Whenever you’re tired, you can always act spoiled around me. The equipment was a different matter though, okay?”

In this fictional world, I’ll become onee-chan’s onee-chan.
At least until the day I learn to stand on my own two feet and manage to support onee-chan.

While etching that oath into my chest once again, I continued to pat her head as though to comfort her.

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